User blog:Orion001/More About me

I have just read a blog that talked about me. I will clearafy what is wrong with me. All the stuff he said was true. I am parnoid, I can not stand criticism, and I have been bulied by younger teenagers and kids. Allot of my problems stern from my childhood. More precisly my dad. My dad has been a negative influence in my life. He crtized everything I have done and put everything good I have done to a dissappointment. He told me at a Christmas Party that I will never become a teacher because it is a long and tough pass. This is not the first time he put down my dreams. When I left High School he told me I should take a career in a trade. Which I never wanted to do. When I told him I wanted to be a zookeeper, he wanted me to be a veterinarian. When I was much younger my mom and dad went to the zoo with me. He wanted to leave early because he said I was bored. Turns out that he was wrong I was very interested in the Zoo, because I made a zoo at home with the toy animals that I got from the zoo gift shop. Last December, me and my dad where taking care of the parking at our church. He went up to the head priest in our church and told him that we were TIRED. A matter of fact I was not tired, only he was so I tried to fight back for my job as a parking lot attendent. It was a no where battle because the head priest had found a replacement for me and my dad. I made a fish dinner for me and my dad last month. I cooked everything my self. I even made Macaroni Salad. He said that the fish did not have enough seasoning and it was under cooked and the Macaroni Salad had to much Mayonnaise. Last year at the youth group end of year BBQ, We picked up all the garbage from all over the church grounds. The next day, my dad told me that we did not clean up from the garbage even when we cleaned up everything. He said he found empty plastic bottles. That is all the hard critisim I had from my dad. The worst part of my dad is that he seems to watch me do everything. He seems to be cures about my activities. He tells me stories that I should not eat fast food because it has to much fat and pur family has a history of health problems. Turns out that was a bunch of bull shit, his family health is due to the fact they came from a third world country and personal choices that they made through out there lifes. The other thing I find is that my dad use tell me to be a good role modle to my brothers. I have done every thing from not smoking, drinking, taking illegal drugs and still my youngest brother is doing drugs, drinking heavily and smoking. He would watch me watching tv, telling me that I should not watch cartoons, even told me I should watch more of the news and do not let the news bother me. It never helped me in choosing shows. Other times it is not my dad that seems to watch me, but it is my brother Ryan. I use to look up stuff on the internet alone. At those times I would be doing it at my dads, unforunitly my brother caught me and I got in trouble. So I am always careful for not doing stuff infront of him. He has also asked me questions about my activities. That is because he teases me for choosing things that is not my age like Arthur, or not my gender like the movie Brave. Sure I am interested in some stuff. But I have learned that I can not change a person, it is a personal choice. He even asks me the tough questions that I personaly can not answer like will I move out from my moms or do you think my mom's boyfriend is trust worthy. It makes me feel like I am not trust worthy. The other type of people I seem to have a problem with is fellow students. There was this kid back in grade 5 that was a dirty pervert and good at getting away with it. His name was Carlos. He would go into the next stall in the washroom and look over the top or under neath and watch people while they are in the washroom. He tells the teacher that he did not do anything when he was there and he feels that it is probably a mistake. This is not the first time. At recess he use to rough house with his class mates, but in the class he acts like a gentlemen and very polite. When I was in High School, I had a One dollar bill. I decided one day to show a fellow classmate the bill. He ripped the bill up. As for being bullied, I been bullied from young and old, both male and female. I was never a big person, I was pretty small for a kid. Even now. The problem is when I want to stand up for my self I get this warning in my head that I much older and if I get in trouble I could go to jail. My brother use to say that to me when we get into a fight. Other times when I get into a fight I am usually the casalty because I was not that strong. There were few times I win a fight like when I was un grade 4, I told down my friend from St. Timothy School that what he did was wrong and he should leave. And the thing is he use to bully me in school. Even lied about a toy I got from aunte in a trip to the Eaton Center at the end of December. Because he destroyed the toy that I lend to him and blamed it on his cousin. These are just some of the problem I had when I was growing up. It might seem enough to change a person but it those have a major changing effect on a person for more than one day.