Brain stands at the ice-cream shop counter and looks at a comic.
Brain: (laughs)
Arthur comes in.
Arthur: Hey, Brain. What's so funny?
Brain: It's this comic book someone left behind. It's called ‘Dopey Dobbs and Patch’. That's Dobbs. He's a dachshund that's not very bright. “Mmm, waffles!” And that's Patch, a sinister cat next door who's always plotting against Dobbs. See, Patch just put hot sauce on his waffles. (chuckles) Poor Dobbs.
The comic panel shows steam coming out of Dobbs’ ears.
Arthur: You really think this is funny? Oh, wait! Is it like a philosophical commentary on life?
Brain: No, I don't think so. It's just... dopey.
Arthur addresses the camera.
Arthur: Sometimes you think you know someone, and then one day they surprise you. Like that time Mr. Ratburn said those five magic words.
Flashback: Mr. Ratburn looks out of the window at two butterflies and a bird.
Mr. Ratburn: Let's have class outside today.
Class: Hh!!
The class sits under a tree outside.
Mr. Ratburn: Alright, you have five minutes to complete this pop quiz. (sighs) Isn't this lovely?
Arthur+Buster: Aw...
The flashback ends.
Arthur: But I’ve never been more surprised by someone then Binky when he... Well, you can see for yourself.
Brain: (laughs) Oh, Patch, how could you?!
Arthur: I really don't get it. Do you?
~~~
Title Card: Binky stops reading a history book in bed
~~~
The school bell rings in Mr. Ratburn’s class.
Mr. Ratburn: Don't forget, there'll be a test tomorrow on Renaissance astronomers.
The kids get up and leave. Binky appears to be waking up.
~~~
Later, Binky and the Tough Customers ride their skateboards through the park.
Binky: Haha!
~~~
Still later, Binky and Mei Lin play with a Slam Wilson booblehead figure.
Binky+Mei Lin: (laugh)
~~~
Still later, while his mom is cooking, Binky plays a ‘Curse of the Moomies’ video game in the kitchen.
~~~
After dinner, Binky watches a pirate movie on TV.
Binky: (laughs)
The screen goes dark.
Binky: Hey!
His mom holds the remote control. She points to the door.
Binky: (sigh) I know, I know. Do your homework. Work, work, work, all I ever do is work.
~~~
Binky walks into his room.
Binky: Bad enough you have to go to school, they make you bring it home too.
He takes a history book out of his backpack and sits down at his desk.
Binky: “Galileo was the son of a famous lute player and he grew up loving music. Ah!
He suddenly looks interested. The clock goes from 08:00 to 11:00. Binky is now reading in bed.
Binky: “They threatened him with torture, but still he would not give up his belief that the Earth revolved around the sun.”
A small Muffy, dressed in an odd bishop’s dress, appears at his right shoulder.
Muffy: Recant, I command you!
A small Galileo, looking like an older Binky, appears at his left shoulder.
Galileo: Never!
The figures disappear.
Binky: “Eventually, he told them what they wanted to hear to avoid being executed, and Galileo, the greatest scientist of his day, was put under house arrest.” Wow! What an amazing story!
He puts the book away and turns out the light.
~~~
The next morning, Binky walks into the classroom.
Mr. Ratburn: Alright, class, settle down! It's time for the test.
Binky: Test??
Mr. Ratburn: Yes, I reminded you all about it yesterday. Now please have a seat.
Binky sits down and the chair breaks.
Binky: Ah!
Mr. Ratburn: Oh dear, I told Mr. Morris we had to fix that chair.
He helps Binky up.
Binky: Do I still have to take the test? What if I hurt my brain?
Mr. Ratburn: Your brain is not on your bottom, Binky. You can sit over there.
Binky sits next to Brain and gets his test.
~~~
Later, the bell rings and the kids leave the classroom. Francine and Muffy stop outside the door.
Francine: That test was impossible!
Muffy: I know. “Name the four moons of Jupiter Galileo discovered”? I didn't even know it had one.
Binky passes them.
Binky: Io, Europa, Ganymede and... Callisto.
Francine: How did he...
Muffy: Those are probably just the names of professional wrestlers.
~~~
Later that day, Mr. Ratburn hands back the tests. Binky’s has an A on it.
Binky: Er... Mr. Ratburn. I think you gave me back the wrong test. This one has an A on it.
Mr. Ratburn: No, Binky, that's yours. Excellent work.
Binky: I got an A. I, Shelley “Binky” Barnes got an A! Woohoo! That's A as in “best”, “terrific”, er... “number one”, “numero uno”... (laughs)
Francine and Muffy who received a B- respectively C+ exchange angry looks.
~~~
That afternoon, Arthur, Buster, Francine and Muffy sit at a table in the Sugar Bowl.
Arthur: Binky cheated??
Francine: Think about it. He had that “accident” with his chair right before so he could sit next to Brain.
Muffy: And Binky never gets an A. It's the only explanation.
Buster: I can think of another explanation.
In his imagination, Binky pulls at the sandbag in his room. A door opens in the floor and Binky goes down a flight of steps.
Buster (narrator): After years of trial and error, Binky finally perfected the recipe for a super-powerful brain-enhancing smoothie.
Binky stands in a laboratory and drinks a red fluid.
Buster (narrator): One beakerful and he temporarily gets the IQ of a genius.
Binky’s eyes swirl and a huge brain grows out of his head. He writes complicated formulae on a blackboard.
Buster (narrator): The only side-effects: uncontrollable hiccups.
Binky: >Hic!<
The fantasy ends. The girls stare at Buster.
Muffy: I meant it was the only explanation that makes sense.
Buster: Well, it's true I didn't actually hear him hiccupping.
Arthur: Sorry, I just don't buy it. Binky may be a lot of things, but he's not a cheater.
Francine: Well, I think he's pretty suspicious.
Buster: Sounds like a mystery. And if there's a mystery, there's only one person to call.
Muffy: Fern?
Buster: Aww!
He puts on his detective hat.
Buster: Does this help?
~~~
In the Barnes’ living room, Binky hangs the framed test in a trophy case and polishes it. Buster knocks on the front door wearing his full detective outfit.
Buster: Alright, Barnes, the jig is up. Admit it, those peepers have been all the way to Sheboygan and back.
He walks inside.
Binky: Huh?
Buster walks to the trophy case.
Buster: Playing dumb, are we? Well, you're out of luck, sister, no one plays dumb better than me.
Binky: What are you talking about?
Buster: The big swindle. The long con. And all for what? One lousy letter from a cheap red pen.
He takes the framed test. Binky snatches it away.
Binky: Are you saying I cheated?!
Buster: Um... Maybe.
Binky: (growls)
Buster: It wasn't my idea. I thought you drank a genius smoothie. You haven't had uncontrollable hiccups, have you?
~~~
Binky confronts Muffy at her locker.
Binky: I didn't cheat!
Muffy: Okay. If you say so.
Binky: Why would you even think that.
Muffy: What did you get on your last test?
Binky: A C-.
Muffy: And the one before that?
Binky: Hrr, I don't even wanna talk about that one.
Muffy: Ha! I rest my case.
She walks away and Binky follows.
Binky: This time was different. I got really into the reading.
Muffy: Oh, relax. It's not like I'm going to tell Mr. Ratburn. But I still think it's wrong.
Binky: I didn't cheat!
~~~
That afternoon, Binky drinks a smoothie in the ice-cream shop.
Binky: It's so unfair. The only time I do really well on a test, no one believes me.
Brain: I do. And it's not everyone, just Muffy and Francine.
Binky: Francine too? I didn't know about her. Aw, man.
Brain: I think it's just because your demeanor suggests a general apathy towards the pedagogical system.
Binky: Oh yeah, that makes it all clear, thanks. Now tell me in English!
Brain: It's your image. You don't seem that into schoolwork.
Binky: Hm...
~~~
That afternoon, Binky gets fake glasses out of a drawer and a jacket out of a closet. He blows dust off a big book.
~~~
The next morning, Binky comes to school dressed like a British banker with a suit, tie and bowler hat.
Binky: Ah, school, my home away from home, as it were. Whoa.
He sits down beside Francine and almost falls off his chair. He puts a book on Aristotle on the desk and opens it. There is a cloud of dust.
Binky: (coughs) Nothing like the smell of a good old book by... A-ris-tot-lee.
Francine: You're not fooling anyone.
Binky: What?? Can't a lad enjoy the simple pleasures of... (checks note:) “intellectual edification”?
Mr. Ratburn: I thought we'd start the morning with a little quiz on last night's reading.
Binky: What?? Aw, man! I mean, er.. Huzzah!
Mr. Ratburn hands out the tests. Francine suspiciously covers hers from Binky’s eyes. Binky looks unhappily at his test.
~~~
Later, Arthur and Binky ride the seesaw in the park. Arthur tries unsuccessfully to make his end come down.
Binky: Not only did I fail that quiz, but Francine and Muffy think it's proof that I cheated the other day. They'll never believe me now.
Arthur: Well, there is one thing you could do.
Binky: What?
Arthur: Get another A. We have a science test coming up.
Binky: That's a great idea!
He gets off the seesaw and Arthur’s end comes down very quickly.
Arthur: Oof!
Binky: Wait! How do I do that?
Arthur: Study.
He slumps backwards.
Binky: I was afraid that's what you'd say.
He walks away.
~~~
That evening, Binky studies at his desk.
Binky: Aww... This is too hard! I'll never be able to get another A. Why even bother?
~~~
Binky brushes his teeth in front of the bathroom mirror. A small Binky with dragonfly wings appears at his shoulder.
Little Binky: After you fail tomorrow's test, everyone will know you're a cheater!
Binky: I didn't cheat! Oh. Even Little Binky does not believe me.
Little Binky: There's one thing you could do to guarantee you'll get an A: bring tiny little cheat sheets with you. No one will know! (mean laugh)
He disappears.
~~~
Binky sits at his desk again and makes cheat sheets.
Binky: “Herbivore: An animal that only eats plants.” (yawns)
~~~
The next day, Binky stands by his locker and stuffs a cheat sheet in his sleeve. Arthur comes.
Arthur: Hey, Binky
Binky: Whoa!
Arthur: Ready for the test?
Binky: Who? Me? No. I mean, I studied but it's not like I have all the answers up my sleeve. (nervous laugh) Chilly, isn't it?
Arthur walks on. Muffy passes by, followed by Francine.
Muffy: Good luck. As if you need it.
Francine: Yeah. Hope your chair doesn't break.
Binky: I didn't cheat!!
He raises his arm and a cheat sheet falls out of his sleeve. He picks it up.
Binky: ...yet.
He walks to a trashcan and throws in the cheat sheet.
Binky: (groans)
He takes more cheat sheets out of his pockets, the front of his shirt and his pant legs and throws them away.
~~~
That afternoon, Binky comes into the ice-cream shop.
Binky: A milkshake! And don't tell me a fruit smoothie is better for me! Today's a milkshake day.
He throws some coins on the counter and a cheat sheet falls out of his sleeve.
Brain: What's that?
Binky: Er... nothing. Just a... fortune from a fortune cookie.
Brain: “Omnivore: An animal that eats both plants and animals.” That's a pretty strange fortune.
Binky: (sighs) I was gonna use little cheat sheets on today's test but I lost my nerve. I thought I had thrown them all out. I spend hours and hours copying stuff out and now I'm just gonna fail anyway.
Brain: Not necessarily. Writing information down is a great way to memorize the material.
Binky: You mean I might have accidentally studied?
Brain: Stranger things have happened.
~~~
The next day, Mr. Ratburn gives back the science tests.
Mr. Ratburn: Good job on yesterday's science test. The average grade was a B+. Although there were a few exceptions.
He puts Binky’s test on his desk. Binky glances at it and looks surprised. He shows Muffy and Francine an A-.
Binky: There! What do you think of that? I got another A.
Muffy: It's an A-.
Binky: Okay, fine, but it's still in the A family. And I wasn't sitting next to Brain. Now do you believe I didn't cheat?
Francine: I'm sorry, Binky.
Muffy: Me too.
Binky: I'm gonna need a bigger trophy cabinet soon. (celebrates in the background)
Francine: I guess we really misjudged him.
Muffy: Yup. Or he really did invent a genius smoothie. Either way, Binky Barnes is a lot smarter than we give him credit for.