Locked in the Library! (episode)/Transcript

Locked in the Library!

Introduction

Arthur walks along the street. Francine passes him on her bike. She drives through a puddle and splashes water on him.

Arthur: Ah!

Francine: Sorry, Arthur!

Arthur: The thing about Francine is it's hard to get mad at her. Except for Buster, she's practically my best friend...ever since the day we met.

Flashback: In preschool Mrs. Read introduces Francine to Arthur.

Jane Read: Arthur, this is Francine. She’s our new neighbor.

Arthur waves at her. Francine licks her lollipop and sticks it on Arthur’s forehead.

The flashback ends.

Arthur: And she's always stuck by me. No matter what, I can always count on Francine.

He walks to the school entrance when he hears a voice. Francine stands behind him with Muffy and Sue Ellen.

Francine: Arthur Read! Did you tell everyone I looked like a marshmallow?!

Arthur: Uh… uh…

Buster joins him.

Buster: Yeah, don’t you remember? When she was wearing that goofy sweater? So, what do you want to do about it?!

Francine: You better apologize or…!

Buster: Or what?!

Francine: to Arthur: …or you’re gonna get it!

Title Card: Francine Bangs Gong

In class Mr. Ratburn writes a homework assignment on the blackboard.

Arthur: to Buster: This is all your fault!

Buster: My fault? You’re the one who called her a marshmallow.

A paper plane flies through the room and hits Arthur’s nose.

Arthur: Oh! (reads:) "This is your final warning."

Buster takes the paper.

Buster: "Because you're in big trouble, and I mean big!" Ooh! I think that's a skull and crossbones.

The boys look over to Muffy, Francine and Sue Ellen who are giving them dirty looks. Buster stands up.

Mr. Ratburn: Attention, please! Mr. Baxter, perhaps you could be persuaded to take your seat! What makes a hero or heroine? And are you born with these characteristics or are they something you develop? Anyway, that is the question I want you to think about over the weekend.

Class: Aw!

Mr. Ratburn: Prepare an oral report on the hero or heroine of your choice. You'll be working in pairs...

Class: Yeah! Yoohoo!

Mr. Ratburn: ...that I will assign.

Class: Aw!

Mr. Ratburn: Binky, I’ve paired you with Sue Ellen.

Sue Ellen: (gasps)

Mr. Ratburn: Muffy, you'll be working with Buster...

Muffy: What??

Buster: No way!

Mr. Ratburn: ...and Arthur with Francine.

Arthur: (gasps)

Francine smashes her pencil on the desk causing the tip to break off.

Buster: Nice knowing you!

***

In the Reads’ kitchen D.W. is on the phone as Arthur comes home.

D.W.: He did what?!

Arthur: Who are you talking to?

D.W.: Francine. Uh-huh? He should talk. You should see what he looks like in pajamas!

Arthur: Gimme the phone!

D.W.: Okay, I'll tell him. Bye. She hangs up. She says she'll meet you at the library tomorrow at three o’clock, but don't say one single word to her, because she's not speaking to you. Hmph! Worm!

She walks away.

***

Arthur enters the library. Francine is leaning against Miss Turner’s desk.

Miss Turner: Hello, Arthur! Francine was just telling me about your...

Francine: Report. On heroes.

Miss Turner: Of course. What sort of hero are you looking for?

Arthur: Well, maybe a man...

Francine: A woman!

Arthur: Or a woman who did something famous.

Miss Turner: Well, Arthur, why not start with Joan of Arc? Horses, battles, exciting stuff. That's downstairs. Francine, you can look into Harriet Tubman. You'll find her upstairs. But don't forget, the library closes promptly at...

Francine: We know - five o'clock.

They go.

***

Arthur reads a Scared Silly book downstairs while Francine sits at a table upstairs reading another Scared Silly book and listening to music on headphones.

Francine: (hums to herself)

Arthur sits down on a couch. The clock above him moves to five o’ clock.

P.A. Announcement: “The library is now closing.”

***

Arthur is asleep on the couch. He gets up.

Arthur: (yawns) He takes the book to the checkout counter. (yawns) Miss Turner? He notices that he is alone and runs to the door. It is locked. (grunts) In his imagination a grandfather clock starts moving. (gasps) A tree in front of the window looks monstrous. Augh!

The clock now looks like a monster.

Clock: (roars)

Arthur: It's only a library! It's only a library! It's only a library! The library looks normal again. Arthur hears clattering. Hello? Is anyone there?

He walks along the bookshelves and bumps into Francine who looks just as scared as him.

Arthur+Francine: Augh!! You!!

Arthur and Francine walk to the entrance hall.

Francine: Arthur, why didn't you tell me what time it was? You got us locked in!

Arthur: Me?! Why didn't you say what time it was?!

Francine: I'm not your mother, Arthur Read! I mean, how dumb does a person have to be to get locked in a library? Anyway, I have no time for childish bickering. I have to get out of here.

Arthur: Fine.

She leaves, he follows.

Francine: Fine. And by the way, I'm still not talking to you. And I'm not listening, either. She puts her fingers in her ears and walks off, right into a bookshelf. Ow!

***

Francine gets a pile of books and nearly bumps into Arthur who had the same idea.

Francine: Hmph!

Francine builds a staircase out of books to reach the window latch. Arthur builds a tower for the same purpose. He almost reaches the latch.

Francine: Oh!

Arthur: Hey! Francine pulls a book from his tower, which topples. Whoa! Oh! He falls down. Thanks, I was almost there!

Francine runs op her staircase and opens the latch. At that moment a fly buzzes around her. She tries to hit it and looses her balance.

Francine: Augh! Ow!

While she sits on the floor, Arthur runs up her staircase and tries to open the window.

Arthur: (grunts) Francine runs next to him and pulls at the window.

Francine: (grunts) Ah! Both fall down. Oo!

Both kids lie on the floor on a pile of books.

Arthur: I just remembered something!

Francine: What?

Arthur: Today is Saturday, which means the library is closed until...

Francine: (gasps)

Arthur+Francine: Monday!!

The word “Monday” echoes through the library.

Arthur: Oh, great! Well, I guess I can live without food.

His stomach rumbles.

Francine: But our families will be worried sick.

In Arthur’s imagination workers are putting Arthur’s toys in boxes and redecorating his room. D.W. lies on Arthur’s bed and supervises them.

D.W.: Poor Arthur. Hope he's okay. And make sure you get rid of that Bionic Bunny poster!

The fantasy ends.

Arthur: Maybe not.

Francine: Wait a minute! I’ve got it!

***

Francine searches through index cards.

Arthur: Are you nuts? How is a book gonna help us?

Francine: "How to Escape from Prison." "How to Escape from a Desert Island." Aha! "How to Escape from a Library"!

***

Francine stands on Arthur’s shoulders to reach the upper part of a book shelf.

Arthur: Hurry up!

Francine: It's not here! Somebody must have checked it out!

Arthur: Francine!

Francine: Who would need a book on escaping from a library, unless they were already in a library...?! They fall down. Oh! A ringing is heard. Arthur! You were supposed to hold me up! Now my ears are ringing.

Arthur: Mine too.

Arthur+Francine: The telephone!

***

They run to the telephone at the checkout counter. Francine reaches it first.

Francine: Ha! Hello.

Muffy is lying on her bed talking into her phone.

Muffy: Hello, Miss Turner? This is Muffy Crosswire. I didn't have a chance to get to the library today...

Francine (on phone): Muffy, thank goodness you called!

Muffy: I was wondering if you could bring me some books that I need.

Francine (on phone): Muffy, listen, it's me!

Muffy: Francine? Sorry, I must have dialled the wrong number.

She hangs up.

Arthur: What did you do?! How could you let her hang up?!

Francine: Keep your shirt on! I'm calling my Mom.

She dials a number.

Recording: “To dial out, you must enter the correct user code. Please hang up and try again. To dial out...”

Arthur: Okay, we're doomed!

He kneels on the floor.

Francine: You're such a wimp!

Arthur: And you're a bossy know-it-all! Marshmallow.

Francine: That does it, Arthur Read! If I have to spend the weekend here, I’m not spending it with you!

She walks off.

Arthur: Fine with me! See if I care!

He walks off in the other direction.

***

Arthur sits at a table and looks at a magazine called “Gourmet”. He briefly imagines a pile of books as a roast turkey. He rips out the page with a picture of a roast turkey and eats it.

Arthur: Francine? He looks between bookshelves. Francine? He comes to the children’s corner. (gasps) The lampions hanging there look spooky in the dark. (gasps) He walks up the staircase. Francine! What happened to you? A woman’s scream is heard. Francine! Don't worry, I'm coming! He runs downstairs and along a corridor. He opens a door which turns out to be a janitor’s closet. He runs on. (pants)

***

Arthur bursts through the staff room door and falls on his face into a pizza on the floor.

Arthur: Whoa! He looks up and sees Francine lying on a couch, eating chips and watching TV. Are you okay?

Francine turns off the TV.

Francine: Of course I'm okay.

Arthur: Don't scare me like that! I was afraid you were hurt or something!

Francine: Why were you worried about me? I'm just a marshmallow, remember?

Arthur: What?! What about when I got glasses? You called me four-eyes!

Francine: Wait a minute. You were worried about me?

Arthur: Of course! And how about when my baby tooth wouldn't come out?

Francine: Arthur.

Arthur: You said that I wasn't allowed to... to... what?

Francine: Want some pizza?

Arthur smiles.

***

Arthur and Francine sit on the couch in the staff room with empty cans and bags of junk food.

Arthur: Where are we, anyway?

Francine: It must be where the librarians hang out. Hey! Let's get locked in here every weekend!

Arthur: This is the best! No chores, no homework, no... D.W.?!

D.W. comes in with Miss Turner.

D.W.: You're in big trouble!

Miss Turner: Arthur, Francine!

The Read and the Frensky parents come in.

Jane Read: Thank goodness!

Miss Turner: I don't know how this could have happened.

The parents hug their children.

David Read: Are you all right? We were so worried!

D.W. examines a video cassette.

D.W.: They look perfectly fine to me.

***

The next week Arthur and Francine are surrounded by their classmates at school.

Francine: Oh, sure there were ghosts! But they didn't bother us!

Arthur: Except for the one with no head, right, Francine?

The school bell rings. The kids walk inside.

Buster: So who did you do your report on?

Arthur: Report?!

***

Muffy does her report with the aid of business charts.

Muffy: And so, it is not an exaggeration to say that without Edward M. Crosswire, there would be no Elwood City as we know it.

She takes a bow. The class clap.

Mr. Ratburn: Buster, do you have anything to add?

Buster stands up.

Buster: (clears throat) No.

He sits down again.

Mr. Ratburn: That brings us to Arthur and Francine.

Arthur and Francine walk to the front looking embarassed.

Arthur: (clears throat) Um...we really didn't get a chance to do a real report.

Francine: Because we were too busy learning the real meaning of heroism. Arthur looks surprised. When we were locked in the library, it might have been really terrible. And at first it was, because we were fighting and everything. But then Arthur came to rescue me, because he thought I was in danger.

Arthur and Francine hold hands.

Arthur: And Francine was really brave and found out where the food was. And she saved me some pizza.

Class: (Wow! Great!)

They cheer.

Mr. Ratburn: That's very good. I think you learned something important. Arthur and Francine low five each other. So I'll give you until next weekend to do your report.

***

Arthur and Buster walk along the street.

Buster: I hate to say it, but Francine's not so bad.

Arthur: She's a lot of fun...

Francine rides by on her bike and splashes mud on them.

Francine: Sorry!

Arthur: … most of the time.